It occurred to me a while back that my passport had expired. This made me nervous. I like that secure feeling you get when you know that, no matter what happens, you can always leave the country.
I went about the rather lengthy business of filling out new paperwork and then off I went to the mall to have my picture taken. My last passport photo was, if not flattering, at least a fair representation of what I look like, minus glasses. So having my picture taken this time didn't seem like too big a deal. Until I got it back.
At first I thought they'd given me the wrong picture. The woman in it looked like she'd been picked up for robbing a 7-Eleven to support her Twinkie addiction and was trying to look remorseful for her mug shot. But since I could hardly go back and ask them to retake the picture because I didn't feel I looked pretty enough, I stuffed the photos in my purse and convinced myself I was being overly critical. No one likes how they look in pictures, right?
When I got home, the reality hit full-force. Upon seeing the photo, the Captain, who is an expert at not reacting to things because he's been married to me for 14 years, actually let out a loud gasp. At this point, I knew it was bad.
So you know I'm not exaggerating, here is the picture I'll be showing to customs officials around the world for the next 5 years: