Posts

Showing posts from January, 2010

My Patronus is a Headless Chicken...or Maybe Courtney Cox

Image
Oh my God. It has taken me three days to finish this post. Every time I sit down to type, one kid or another starts throwing things or pestering for snacks or taking a header off the coffee table. CALGON! TAKE ME AWAY!!!

Busy and frazzled though I've been, I've had a much better week than the last one. I do appreciate all your lovely comments, and I'm now in the process of learning how to make a perfect vodka martini (thanks for the suggestion, Deb!). When I've unravelled the mystery, I'll post pictures and a recipe!

Here's a glimpse at what the inner workings of my brain look like right now. Prepare for some randomness. **
Numero uno, Firstborn and I have a Friday night ritual. After Rosemary's Baby is in bed (he can join us one day. Right now he's just too disruptive.), we grab a snack and have our own little movie night. Lately, Firstborn's movies of choice have been of the Harry Potter variety, which is just fine with me. They're entertaining A…

Is This How Heart Disease Starts?!

By the time Valentine's Day hits, my heart is going to look like that picture they used to show us in health class to stop us from smoking.

I was going about my business in the kitchen on Wednesday afternoon, when I saw an unfamiliar minivan pulling into my driveway and coming from the direction of the base. For a normal person, this would not be a reason for the heart to rise up to four times it's normal rate. But we live in the middle of nowhere, and we almost never get unexpected visitors in unfamiliar cars. The Captain is doing a dangerous job in a dangerous place, and so seeing that van pull in made me panic a little. I sprinted to the door, repeating my mantra: "It's just the Jehovah's Witnesses!" It wasn't, but it wasn't the army either. It was my neighbour swinging in (in his second vehicle, which I never see) to check that all was well with us. We live in a very friendly place.

Then, I was woken up last night around midnight to the phone ringin…

I Am A Cougar. Oh God...

Image
I remember when I hit thirty and realized that my doctor, dentist, vet and lawyer were all suddenly younger than me. That I could handle. This, not so much.

With the Captain away, I get to watch any TV I please. What I've wanted to watch lately is The Tudors. When I was eight (and obviously living in England), my class took a trip to the Tower of London. Being a dork, I did lots of reading about it beforehand and convinced myself I was actually going to come face-to-face with the headless spectre of Anne Boleyn. Sadly, that didn't happen. Actually, so very little happened on that school trip that I barely remember it at all. But thanks to the magic of books, I've been rather enamoured with the whole thing ever since. So, I could pretend that I watch this show because I have a scholarly interest in the reformation, the monarchy, and the life of women in Tudor England. But really, it's all about the bodice-ripping.
The Tudors is what the Captain likes to call "a soap …

Why Rocks Make Better Pets

Image
I spent a good hour making a pumpkin pie from scratch last night, using one of the pumpkins from our garden. I left it to cool overnight and then tried a slice for breakfast this morning. It's a good thing that I did.

When I came back out to the kitchen 5 minutes later, I found my pie plate looking mysteriously like this:


And Rusty looking mysteriously like this:

Someone is in grave danger of winning a one-way trip to the hot dog factory...

TV and Sugar Cereal: An Important Part of a Complete Childhood

Yesterday, I was playing downstairs with my kids when I came across a little tiger finger puppet I'd made for them ages ago. I put it on my finger, wiggled it around and started saying "Frosted Flakes Good? They're Grrrrrreat!"

I expected Firstborn to laugh, but he just looked at me quizzically and asked "Why are you saying that?" And I realized that not having them planted in front of the TV all day has it's downside! Thanks to our refusal to pay for cable TV, and Rosemary's Baby's penchant for breaking the rabbit ears (which aren't really available in stores anymore anyway), my kids are really lacking in pop-culture!

If you too have this disasterous social problem, the good news is that I've taken this opportunity to learn how to embed a video in my posts! Show this cheesy old commercial to your kids. They'll thank you for it later.